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In light of the passing of my grandmother, Bibi jaan, here is another article on her great life by my dear cousin, Dr. Muhammad Hafizullah.

Subhanallah, I still cant believe that the next time I return to visit Pakistan… she won’t be there.

Source: The Statesman (Pakistan)

Allah (SWT) Subhanu Taala has His own ways of blessing His beloved people. Though she had a protracted long illness, she had preserved intellect, hearing and sight till the end. She always prayed for a ’smooth and painless’ transition so as not to burden any one and she finally received the invitation from Allah (SWT) Subhanu Taala without any distress and pain. When she died, it was raining all day since morning but the rain stopped at her nimaz-e-janaza and burial so that her final rites could be performed without any inconvenience.

Bibi Jan

By Dr. Muhammad Hafizullah

Bibijan was a supreme example of self sacrifice. She sacrificed all her happiness and aspirations at the altar of self-defined principles and self-determined duties. Her life was synonymous with love and sacrifice. Her whole life revolved around fulfilling duties which she never had to do! She tried making other people happy which was the ultimate source of joy for her. Right from her youth she bartered her personal joys with responsibilities and obligations of the family. Till the end she tried her best to fulfill her obligation and live up to the expectations.

The icy hands of angel of death took her sister away when she was in early twenties. Her three elder sisters got married and settled in their homes. She was faced with a big challenge, to either commit her whole life to raise seven young children of her late sister or to opt for a personal married life. She, without second thoughts, opted for the first choice. She could not imagine the enormity of the challenge and the tremendous hurdles she had to face on the way! She was determined to raise four young nephews and three nieces as good Muslims and to equip them with all worldly traits and education. Raising seven children that eventually led to seven happy families was a major undertaking! She took the challenge single handedly and like a ’single parent’ ensured good grooming of the children.

It was 3 am as I announced death of a member of the family to her. She got ready to visit the family but before reaching their house she had literally thrusted a five hundred rupees note in my pocket. This was meant to be my ‘mubaraky’ for the promotion. Though she was very upset on the sad demise, in her grief she did not want to delay the ‘mubarak badi’, even for a few hours. She was always very particular about presents and ensured proper gifts to be delivered in time. She was always extravagant in presents we always looked forward to her after clearing our examinations!

She was a shy and quiet lady but was a very good company. She had good memory and even during her last few years she could take one down the memory lane giving vivid glimpses of the past. She had many stories to tell and had an interesting way of unraveling them. She got along well with all regardless of age and background.

She believed in ‘personal relationships’ and enjoyed extremely cordial relationships with all her grand and great grand children. They were like her personal friends. She would make a big effort to invest in these relationships and enjoyed the respect and love she received from the off springs. She had special gifts for all the younger generation on passing examinations and had special things to offer on Eid.

Among many stories her favourite one included the trips she made to USA and Saudi Arabia. She spent about six weeks in New York with her son Dr Sajjad Ahmed and the family and thoroughly enjoyed it.

America did not intimidate her rather she enjoyed discovering new places. She enjoyed visits to Washington and New Jersey. All my Mamoon and Mammani’s friends threw lavish dinners for her and undoubtedly she kept New York ‘warm and alive’ for a few weeks. She endeared all their friends and no one wanted to be left out for not having her as a ’special guest’. Haseeb and Naveed became her favourites and enjoyed her company. No wonder they did not want her to leave America and were crying bitterly at her departure from USA.

She had the good fortune of performing Haj along with her sons Dr Sajjad and Salahuddin - who was working in Madina Shareef at that time. Both the sons had the good fortune of looking after her. She was very lucky to perform all the ‘arkan’ in a most befitting way. She had always been most grateful to Allah Subhanu Taala for His unlimited kindness and offering her the chance to perform Haj.

My mother being the eldest of the family was like second in command besides being a special friend, comrade and adviser to her. They enjoyed exceptionally cordial and friendly relationship based on mutual trust and love. My mother’s early demise left a large vacuum in her life which no one could fill. Bibijan’s special relationship with us -sister and brothers was an overflow of love for our mother. She used to accompany Ammie on her trips. She visited Karachi a couple of times with Ammie and stayed with our life long family friends. Over there she endeared her self to all. I vividly remember teasing Ammie and Bibijan on their shopping sprees to Bohri Bazaar and Tariq Road and buying truck loads presents for people. She had especially intimate relationships with my sister and both had enormous love for each other. She would spend weeks at her place in Islamabad and there she developed cordial personal contacts with her husband and all her children. She was most helpful in performing little things and everyone enjoyed her company.

The persons who really looked after her most of her life especially the later part of were the eldest ‘mamoon’ Niaz Ahmed and his wife - who also happened to be her own niece. Between the two of them they provided company and looked after her all material and medical needs. They would take her around to visit relatives and friends. They ensured that she was fed properly and many a time they would spend hours feeding her with a spoon. They were the comrades of long nights when she would be in distress and needed care. The mammani was in tears and was very distressed as she departed because she lost a mother, a mother in law, a khala and a friend in one person. She enjoyed very cordial relationships with all their daughters whom she had actively helped in bringing up. She had very warm relationship with their husbands and children.

My eldest khala had a special relationship with her. Off and on she would bring her home and provide her company and love. She looked upto her as a mother, friend and adviser. My khala was most genuinely worried about her well being and health.

All her children were very fond of Bibijan and she had a very special place for all of them in her heart. No wonder that Hafsa came running from Karachi, Saad from Quetta, Fahd from Dubai and Wasay from Karachi to participate in her funeral and pay their final respect.

She tried her level best to keep the family intact and protect them under her wings. Her most favourite was the youngest khala and her children, whom she had brought up as a very young kid. My youngest khala, a grandmother in herself, was wailing and crying on her departure. She would start missing her after every few days and would insist on visiting her house.

She had a very soft corner for the youngest Mamoon Wiqaruddin. She was very fond of him and his children and was always worried about his well being. She was always worried about Salahuddin Mamoon’s health and well being. She was always there to look after him when he needed some one around. His son Ali, was her favourite and they got along very well.

Allah Subhanu Taala has His own ways of blessing His beloved people. Though she had a protracted long illness, she had preserved intellect, hearing and sight till the end. She always prayed for a ’smooth and painless’ transition so as not to burden any one and she finally received the invitation from Allah Subhanu Taala without any distress and pain. When she died, it was raining all day since morning but the rain stopped at her nimaz-e-janaza and burial so that her final rites could be performed without any inconvenience.