Muslim Bubble Syndrome
Published by Haseeb February 25th, 2007 in IslamSource: Islamica
Muslim Bubble Syndrome
Rethinking the Importance of Structure
By AZHAR USMAN
It is well-settled that one of the defining characteristics of
modernity—of what makes contemporary civilization work—is its reliance
upon structure. As a rule, to be successful at anything in the modern
world requires process and procedure. In a word, structure. In this
regard, throughout my life, I have observed an interesting phenomenon
among Muslims: they seem to believe that this rule does not apply to
them. I refer to this phenomenon as Muslim Bubble Syndrome (MBS). It is
as if so many Muslims believe that they live in a bubble; that they are
not subject to the simple and undeniable rules that apply to the entire
universe around them.
Perhaps some illustrative examples shall prove useful.
First, the very notion of institution building amongst Muslims—in the
Muslim world as well as throughout the Western Muslim Diaspora—is quite
popular as a concept. However, on the ground, almost every so-called
Islamic institution that I have observed in North America and Europe is
run and managed like a zoo or a circus. (Actually, strike that. I
recently took my kids to the circus and even it was well-organized and
professional!) Consider, for example, American mosques, most of which
are haphazardly managed by a group of volunteer board members and a
few (if you’re lucky!) paid staff members. Invariably though, key
decisions regarding day-to-day operations are left to volunteers, most
of whom treat their volunteer commitments to the mosque the way they
would social commitments to acquaintances: “Yeah, we really should get
together some time.”
The problem is easy to diagnose: unprofessionalism. Most mosque
managements suffer from MBS. They are convinced that everything can be
handled by a bunch of half-committed volunteers, in spite of the fact
that everything in the world around us indicates otherwise. Nearly every
American church and synagogue is run and managed by a full-time staff of
paid professionals. Why? Because in the world outside the Muslim Bubble,
people understand that there is an industry of religious workers. There
is nothing insincere or ethically problematic about being a “religious
professional.” Business schools across the U.S. offer specialized
degrees in religious nonprofit management. Non-Muslim institutions
employ such individuals; Muslim organizations are generally unaware of
their existence. To create comparable institutions, Muslims will have to
invest as heavily in developing a cadre of Muslim religious
professionals as they have in acquiring land and erecting buildings, on
which countless millions of dollars have been spent.
Interestingly, it seems little thought has even been put into the
governance structures of American mosques. Most seem to follow corporate
models, with presidents and executive committees, volunteer boards of
directors, paid memberships and elections—but why? Who decided that this
is the best, most efficient or most effective manner of running and
managing a mosque? Have other models been tried? How were mosques
managed throughout Muslim history? Sadly, the mosque president—who is
likely a full-time physician or engineer—probably has no answers.
And of course, even those American mosques that seem to have figured out
that they must have a paid full-time imam if they are ever to become
legitimate organizations are nonetheless highly unrealistic with their
expectations and demands on such an imam. He must be college-educated
with amazing oratory and rhetorical abilities for Friday sermons,
preferably a hafiz (i.e., entire Qur’an committed to memory—especially
relevant for leading nightly prayers every Ramadan); must be fluent in
both English and Arabic (Urdu is a major plus!); be able to teach and
relate to young and old alike (and play basketball with the “youth,” of
course); and don’t forget his public relations skills because he has to
field and handle all interview requests from local and national media
whenever anything “Muslim-related” breaks in the news (which is
basically every day!). And for good measure, he might as well be a
licensed psychologist and/or social worker to handle the pre-marital,
marital, post-marital, family and mental health counseling and therapy
needs of the entire community. All this for an underwhelming $50,000
salary plus so-called competitive benefits. By these standards, American
imams are either the most under-qualified bunch of employees—or
low-grade superheroes!
Mosque management aside, Muslim professionals will go on at length at
dinner parties, coffee houses and hooka bars across the globe about the
problems of the world and how they, of course, have all the answers.
This is a variant of MBS known as Muslim Empire Syndrome (MES), which is
the phenomenon of being so self-unaware that one thinks one could solve
the problems of the entire world, or the non-existent “Muslim Empire,”
or American politics, or whatever, but for the fact that one has been
trained as a specialized physician who cannot even solve the parking
challenges of his local mosque. (And yes, this column admittedly suffers
from a hint of MES too.)
Another example of MBS I recently observed is the lack of uniformity in
the method of citation of authoritative religious sources in Muslim
literature, or lack of standardization of rendering Arabic phrases into
English, or even mere transliteration of Islamicate languages into
English characters. A friend recently told me that he wants to
transliterate a famous Urdu book into English letters—which I honestly
think is great—except that he announced that he plans to invent his own
system of transliteration to render Urdu sounds into English since, as
he says, his system is going “to be so much easier” than what’s out
there. Of course, the countless academics who have been working
tirelessly for decades on creating and developing uniform systems of
transliteration are all idiots—and he, a professional computer network
engineer, is going to work out a superior methodology during his spare time.
The great irony in all this is the fact that Islam is a highly
structured religion, with meticulously worked out theological
formulations and perhaps even more legal formalisms. It is hoped that
the coming Muslim generations inevitably taking up the responsibility of
Muslim institution-building will be more successful at developing an
intelligent understanding and application of their faith that syncs with
the undeniable realities and irreversible trends of modernity. Who
knows, maybe one of them will even hold the pin that pops the bubble?
AZHAR USMAN is a leading Muslim comedian. He co-founded “Allah 
Made
Me Funny”—The Official Muslim Comedy Tour” in 2004, which was subject of
an entire episode of ABC Nightline in March 2005. His website is
www.azhar.com
as salam `alaykum
It’s sad, but true. Our mosques are being controlled by a bunch of idiots.
The part about the underpaid Imams struck me. Coincidentally, I was thinking about it today. I was talking to Hamzah (http://www.maniacmuslim.com) and Mudasser (http://molvi.wordpress.com) just today.
The Imams in the community have to deal with so much crap. They’re at the forefront of society. They’re in the trenches battling out the problems. And yet, we underpay them, or worse, disrespect them.
Sad state of affairs indeed.
Ahsan
walaikumaslaam warahmatullahi wabarkatuhu
And unfortunately the future doesnt look any better. How many smart young brothers actually study to become imams? Were all too busy becoming engineers, doctors, and lawyers…
btw - hamza and mudasser - i know them. They should remember me from RIS 2 years ago. (I’m Amir & Salman’s friend) Next time u see them give them my salaam
thanks for the comment
wasalaam
as salam `alaykum
Insha Allah
I will convey your regards to them. 
I’ve done a great deal of thinking about the “smart” ones becoming Imams. And that’s perhaps because I have personally experienced what it feels like to be denied the opportunity taking on such a responsibility.
For the me, the biggest obstacle has been parental permission. Unfortunately, many parents are stuck in that “get a job, get married” mode. They have no vision, no mission in life except to procreate. Which is why many of us (myself included) end up becoming engineers and doctors and God only knows whatever else.
I remember that I had suggested to my parents the possibility of studying theoretical/cosmological physics at university (me being non-practicing at the time). A vehement “No!” was the answer. Even at that level, parents are unwilling to budge. Having being denied the possibility of studying something that I loved, one can only imagine what would have taken place when I suggested to them that I wanted to go out and become an `alim.
I think we need a complete overhaul in our collective thinkings. The Bubble Syndrome is merely a manifestation of something far, far deeper. We’ve been ingrained with merely going out and seeking what our nufoos desire. Far too long, I say, far too long…
Ahsan
As salaam alaikum.
This bubble theory while published to be funny is also partially true — I think that is what makes it so funny.
We, as believers must reach out of our bubble to build a stronger foundation for our Ummah. For the sake of our children and grandchildren our homes need to be living, breathing Islamic community centres — with prayer, good religious books, Islamic study, sadaqah boxes, visible sadaja’s in every room etc… A place where the call to prayer is heard and responded to!!!
If the family is the cornerstone to society then it follows that once our homes become more like masjids then our masjids will be more like masjids.
There are my 4 pence.
Wa salaama,
nuh ibn
there goes another Three Letter Acronym-MBS.
‘organised’ & ‘professional’ read & sound real good, it may also lead to cleaner mosques and bigger collections every friday… but we could end up with replacing our current in-efficiencies with the tyranny of the ‘religious professional’, europe took a long time with a couple of hundred thousand deaths to exorcise the ‘religious professional’.
as for our imam’s, we are not seeking a ‘polymath’ but a ‘generalist’, and as you say if we start investing in HR like we invested in building mosques, we’re gonna see change pretty soon, insha’Allah
.
btw couldn’t figure out a connection between phonetics and MBS..
khuda hafiz
well, the mosques are not really run by imams though. I have seen mosques run but one board member or chairperson who wants to rule like a dictator. The imam then just becomes his puppet and says things to support him even if it is going against the haqq.
Sadly that is a problem.
In addition to un-professionalism.
We all need to be professional, especially when organizing muslim activities.
the mosques and imams over here get a hard deal (especially by certain organisations) and there are valid concerns but like the article pointed out, alot is expected from the imams.
As also mentioned in the article, many masjids are run by volunteers, “imported imams” consist of overcrowded classes, small rooms etc and the pressure and stress can mount up to the point that teachers will quit. Parents should be involved in supporting their local masjids and teachers, not just using them.
And we often forget that teachers/imams need to earn a living and support their families too.
Assalamualeikum wa rahmatullah,
So painfully true! Br. Azhar has pointed out some issues about the Muslim community in general that, I believe, is something that is very well observed but not much talked about. I hope that the Muslim youth will look closely at the Sunnah of the Prophet (S) and realize that there is, in fact, structure in the way the Prophet(S) and the Sahabah led the Muslim community. There is much to be learned and implemented. May Allah
reward Br. Azhar for writing this and Br. Haseeb for posting it.
Assalamualeikum
Tamzid (as well as Maheen) linked me to this article - so please make dua for them as well!
Assalaamualaikum,
This is a response to sister Usma’s post:
I agree about the part that mosques here need to be supported, but I like the fact the the mosques here get a hard time.
It’s called accountability, which in my opinion is an islamic concept pf enjoining the good and forbidding the bad. There are some great organisations like MPACUK that try to help the mosques, stand beside mosques that want to stand for the truth, but gives hell to those that are leading Muslims down the sewer.
Muslims do not do enough for the mosques either, we abuse the imams and then complain. If the imam is in the wrong hold him to account in a respectful manner and get the matter resolved.
But the worst part is that mosques aren’t run by the imams at all - it’s the dreaded committee members, most of whom can barely string a sentence together in english and some are racist (only allow muslims from certain backgrounds onto the committee).
I personally beleive that in the UK the anger and fustration felt by the many Muslims (esp. youth) will boil over and there will be a coup against the mosques - I don’t want this to happen, but i worry that due to the actions of mosque committee members of choking the youth will cause this revolt - but i worry that it might be violent revolt.
Fiamaanallah,
R
Wasalam br Abu Funza,
I was actually referring to MPAC. I understand and agree with their concerns but the way they have gone about trying to sort some of these issues out has, I believe,had an adverse affect on the community and on the image of MPAC. Remember the “Women only jihad” piece? I was so dismayed by it.
Yes we need to work with our masjids and our elders but with adab and wisdom. I don’t judge MPAC based on that documentary but less shouting and anger would perhaps help.
Hey…. The bubble’s gonna burst
Bring on the next generation….
Assalaamualaikum sister Usma,
I was dismayed too, but not by the actions of MPACUK but rather by that of the mosque thugs than of asghar bukhari and co.
At the Global Peace and Unity Event I went to MPAC’s stall and asked them about the documentary, because i loved every minute of it and asked them how they would respond to questions about adaab and whatnot. I thought that their reply was excellent.
mpacuk mentioned about how the campaign had been going on for 7 yrs and was filmed over 3 months, it wa cut down to 45 mins, so i doubt we’ll see a true representation of what happened.
I asked them about how they just seemed to jump out at the mosques, but they had a laptop there and they made me watch the documentary again and showed the part where one of the sisters said that they phoned beforehand - so i was wrong.
Then i asked them about causing trouble outside the mosques, but then they handed me a leaflet which had a hadith about how women shouldn’t be deprived of their share of the mosques and how even though it’s not compulsory for a sister to go to a mosque, if she wants to pray there we shouldn’t try to stp her with force (”there is no compulsion in religion”). Also they talked about how when the cameras were rolling the brothers knew that they were there so could’ve handled the situation like muslims instead of like cultural bigots.
The only reason why i defend what mpac did is because it bought about change - four mosques in south london now want to accomodate sisters, that in my eyes is a major acheivement!
But i agree we must hold the mosques to account with etiquette, but the reaction of the mosques leaves a lot to be desired - and sometimes it’s the masses of muslims who go to the mosques who will have to stand up because some mosques - the leaders are not going to change, the lust for power is too great (for some).
I think the best thing we can do to reform our institutions is to join the committees ourselves (sisters included! i know a sister who joined her local mosque commitee - the first ever in her mosque
) and give our input.
However..if the mosques don’t let us join then we have to get those leaders out!
Fiamaanillah,
Abu Funza
P.S. I like your blogs haseeb and sister usma - keep it up!
Let’s not forget the attitude toward women in many masajids (though not all). The separate and thoroughly unequal prayer facilities are so disgraceful, it makes you wonder if your even in a house of prayer, let alone in America. Imagine how the nonMuslim American public would react to such accomodations.
It’s a shame no one considers the psychological impact it has on the young girls that come in with their mothers and are relegated to facilities with back entrances to small cold rooms with no view. In all other places in America and the rest of the western world these young girls enjoy equal facilities with equal participation and respect for their abilities.